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Every couple needs someone who will speak into their relationship."A mature couple can serve both the role of accountability partners and mentors who help the couple develop the skills necessary for building a great marriage," says Jeffrey Murphy, marriage mentor and co-author of . We also had a few couples that we spent time with who would prod into our situation." Jason is a worship leader and minister at Regent University in Virginia Beach, Va.We're a generation that's almost marked by a lack of self-discipline.We spend too much, we eat too much and it seems as though our sexual appetites have no limits.When I typed out these words as an idea for an article on abstinence, I realized this was a difficult topic to get people talking about.When I asked my peers to share their stories, few were virgins with no sexual history, and even fewer wanted to talk about it. Recounting my own sin made me feel like the chief of hypocrites.There seemed to be a special connection between them that made me wonder, It started me on a quest to discover what I call "practical abstinence." All of the "true love waits" messages mean nothing if they can't be put into practice.And that seems to be where many Christians fall short. You can't jump into dating and expect that sexual temptation won't be an issue.

In reality, our sexuality is only a small piece of who we are.

Viticus Thomas, one half of the married couple behind Dating and Waiting, a ministry that promotes abstinence, advises young men to not make sex a focal point, but to instead point the relationship in a better direction.

One way a man can do this is by paying attention to the kinds of dates he plans.

So, sexual desire is a big deal to us, because it was first a big deal to God.

It is a gift, but it needs to be , which is exactly where we're having trouble today.

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